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Can I Just Say One Thing? By CJ Van Gieson, The Antagonistic Mom So. Lottery jackpot: $294.8 million. Four winners. It’s a nice sum of money to split four ways, right? Each ticket is worth $73.7 million, but all four winners opted for the lump-sum payment of $41.4 million. Okay, so who won? Well, a mother of three from Minnesota; an elderly couple from Maine; someone who is still choosing anonymity, and … well … an unemployed 46-year-old ex-convict named Edwards from Kentucky. Seems Edwards served ten years for robbery and a couple of other prison terms for "possession of firearms." Can I just say one thing? I don’t know about you, but candidly, I don’t feel a good level of comfort here knowing that an ex-con with a special affection for firearms is now in possession of $41.4 million. I mean call me nutty, but that kind of coinage can bankroll some mega firepower. The other thing that kills me is Edwards being quoted as saying, "I’ve made some mistakes in my past … but now I can do something positive with my future." He plans to take that first step on the comeback trail by marrying his 26-year-old fiancée, Shawna, in the tropics, and buying a Rolls-Royce he’s "had his eye on." Excuse me? Maybe I’m all green with envy here, but what is an unemployed ex-con doing with his eye on a Rolls-Royce in the first place? Gee, maybe he thought some day he’d win the … well … never mind. I don’t know. I’m thinking maybe only people who aren’t ex-cons should get to buy lottery tickets? Or, how about this: only ex-cons who weren’t caught in possession of firearms should be allowed to buy lottery tickets? But I guess that would still leave rapists, murderers, thieves and child molesters in the loop. As winners, I like the non ex-con elderly couple from Maine. When she realized she held a winning ticket, 70-year-old wife, Pat hid the $41 million dollar ticket in a box of Corn Chex. Then she tried to wake her husband. "Erwin, we won the Powerball," she said. He said, "Uh huh," and went back to sleep. He was probably really tired because he mows grass for a living. Or he used to. Erwin, we won the Powerball. Let’s freakin’ party! |
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